INTRODUCTION
The modern adaptations of Conquistador life as recorded by Bernal Diaz and Pedro de Cieza fall on https://crackpot.substack.com/t/incadinca
“Clamor in the East, Attack in the West. Attack him where he is unprepared, appear where you are not expected.” - Sun Tzu
6 Cholula
We stayed in Tlaxcala for 17 days. There we heard much about Montezuma’s wealth and the discussion question came up, should we push on to Mexico City? Some thought this was too rash an idea. That we should not enter such a strong city. Others argued for it, mad with goal. Cortes waited as we argued back and forth. Then Pedro de Alvarado asked, ‘What do you think, Captain Cortes’. Captain Cortes shrugged. Then Cortes replied that there was no other course open to us. He explained that we had constantly asserted and proclaimed our desire to see Montezuma himself. This has cowed and impressed our hosts. To back out now would lose their respect and risk their wrath.
When Mace Escasi and Xicotenga saw we were leaving for Mexico, their spirits sank. They advised Cortes to stay away from Cholula and go through Huexotzingo. Cholula was a large town, with stone towers, tall pyramids and situated on a beautiful plain. We intended to go. Captain Cortes sent runners ahead to Cholula, bearing the message that we were on our way. That Cortes wondered why they had not come to pay their respect to the Conquistadors like the other towns had done. Cortes requested the caciques and priests to welcome them, or he would take their indifference for ill will.
Four of Montezuma’s ambassadors arrived in Tlaxcala right before we set to depart for Cholula. Cortes received them.
AZTEC AMBASSADOR: Montezuma sends his regards, Malinche Cortes. But he wonders how you can stay so long among wicked people, the traitors and thieves of Tlaxcala? Are you not put off by their ill-bred manners and bad breath? Montezuma invites you to come at once to his city as guests.
Captain Cortes thanked the ambassadors and promised to come soon to Mexico. Then Cortes said to us, without translators.
CAPTAIN HERNAN CORTES: Montezuma wants us to come, now we must stay a bit.
The Cholula’s sent four commoners in response to Cortes summon, who arrived just then. Cortes scolded them that this was unacceptable and asked them to send important men, not commoners. The Cholula messengers explained that the Tlaxcalan’s were their enemies, and they feared for their lives to come here. At this Cortes insisted we go to visit them in Cholula. As there was no sensible argument against this, the invitation was allowed. The Tlaxcalans offered to send 10,000 of their warriors with Cortes. Cortes thought it over and replied that it would not make sense to bring an army if we were going as friends and allies. So the Tlaxcalans sent 1000 warriors as an escorting force. Montezuma’s ambassadors witnessed all this and grew visibly distressed. The conquistadors were building alliances in every territory and knocking on Mexico’s door.
Montezuma’s Gifts to Cortes
A mask worked in a mosaic of turquoise; a double twisted snake worked into the same stones of the nose, the tail parted from the head and the head with part of the body went above one of the eyes so that it formed an eyebrow and the tail curled up to form the other eyebrow. This mask was decked with a great and lofty crown, full of rich feathers, long and beautiful. (the above is AI generated from the description - where is the real thing? this mask once resided at the British Museum in American Antiquities - duckduckgo ‘British museum Montezuma’s masks’ image search yields no result that matches the description. Hmm.)
We marched onto Cholula in a day then camped along a river a short distance from the city. The Cholula Caciques sent chieftans to welcome us with poultry and maize bread that night. In the morning the priests and Caciques and townspeople of Cholula greeted us. The priests with their braziers of burning coals and incense fumigated us. When the Cholulans recognized the Tlaxcalans we brought, they refused entry for them to the city. Cortes agreed and asked them to stay in the fields outside.
Then Cortes made a speech where he asked the Cholulans to give up their Idos, human sacrifice, cannibalism. They replied in disbelief that we had hardly entered the country and were already asking them to change their beliefs. After this we all entered the city, which was a beehive of excitement and crowded streets of people coming to see us and the horses.
Montezuma’s ambassadors were still with us in Cholula. Montezuma sent word to them to tell the Cholulans that an Aztec army of 20,000 men were on their way to attack us. Montezuma wanted 20 of us captured alive and brought to Mexico for sacrifice. Montezuma sent many presents as well of jewels, cloths and a golden drum.
Montezuma’s warriors were stationed in ranches and rocky thickets outside of Cholula and within houses. For two days they fed us well. On the third day they stopped and began laughing at us from a distance. Cortes told Montezuma’s ambassadors to order the Caciques to bring more food, but they just brought firewood and water. The old men said there was no more maize.
Just then more of Montezuma’s ambassadors. They told Cortes that they were no longer welcome to come to Mexico City, there was nothing there for them to eat. Cortes yawned and remarked with sarcastic wonder at Montezuma’s capricious vacillating, likening Montezuma’s behavior to a woman in love. One day he invites us, the next day he sends us away. Then Cortes told the ambassadors to stay because he intended to leave for Mexico City the next day. He bribed them with beads so they agreed to spend a night and leave with us.
Cortes then dressed down the Caciques and chieftains of Cholula for not giving them anything to eat, and said if they were no longer welcome they would leave the next day for Mexico and speak to Montezuma. Cortes asked them to provide carriers and transport for them at once. At this they admitted Montezuma had sent word not to feed them.
While this conversation took place, three Cempoala warriors with us came and told Cortes about pits with spikes they found in the streets covered over with wood and earth - meant for our horses to fall into. There were also breastworks of adobe and thick timbers in the streets. Tlaxcalan warriors came in to tell Cortes to expect an attack that night and that the Cholulas made a sacrifice the previous night to curry favor in an attack on the conquistadors.
Under the pretenses of readying our baggage, we spent the day fortifying defenses and maintaining vigilant watch outside our quarters in the city. No surprise attack was possible. That night we conquistadors discussed our options. Some favored an attack first in the town. Hit the Cholulans in their homes and streets. That if we left without punishing their treachery, we would meet more of the same in the next town. Cortes agreed. To Montezuma’s Ambassadors we should tell them how the Chululans tried to blame Montezuma for their treachery. The Ambassadors denied knowing anything, but were placed under our guard and could not leave.
An old woman of the town came to Dona Maria that night and told her of the plot to kill us all. “Come with me,” she said. Dona Maria tricked her by agreeing to leave us but brought her before Cortes instead to tell him what she knew of the plot.
When dawn broke, the Caciques and priests brought in the warriors, laughing as though we were already bound and staked. We were prepared. The soldiers with swords and shields stationed themselves at the gate of court. Captain Cortes was mounted on horseback. Cortes addressed the Caciques, asking them why they wished to do us harm when we had been friends. Why had they been raising battlements and breastworks in the town? Why had they withdrawn the women and children? They put the blame on Montezuma’s orders. With the firing of a musket as signal, we struck. Our fighting was too much and the Tlaxcalan allies we brought descended upon the city of Cholula, plundering and taking prisoners. After two days of this, the Caciques made peace with Cortes. Cortes scolded them and summoned Montezuma’s ambassadors. After threatening to destroy the city and kill them, he pardoned them. Then Cortes asked the Tlaxcalans to return their booty and release prisoners. After restoring order, Cortes asked them to destroy their Idols and erect a cross. This they did. When Montezuma’s troops stationed in the ravines outside Cholula learned what happened, they returned to Mexico and told Montezuma what happened.
Before we left Cholula we found prisons of thick wooden beams, full of Indian boys being fattened for sacrifice and to be eaten. We broke open all these prisons. Cortes ordered the prisoners return to their native countries.
After 14 days in Cholula, we had nothing more to do. The city was peopled. The Idols cast down. We established friendship between Tlaxcala and Cholula, where they were once enemies. Montezuma continued sending his spies to our camp. We sent word to Montezuma that we were on a mission from God and our King. We crossed many seas and lands to see him. We said we believed the Cholulans tried to blame their treachery on him. When Montezuma heard this, he sent ambassadors bearing gifts of gold and jewels. At this we set out for Mexico City from Cholula, though many of our Cempoala allies refused to come any closer than Cholula and split from our company.